Things That You Should Never Say to Your Partner

Here at Dating 4-1-1, we've been telling you guys that one of the best way to impress other people is by being a great conversationalist. Knowing what to say, when to say it and how to say it are essentials in becoming a smooth talker who will get all the ladies for the guys and guys for the ladies. But of course, there are still certain things that you must stir clear to avoid any unnecessary events. As they say, there is alwasy an exception to the rule. And those exceptions are the following...

"She's/He's Hot!"
No matter what you do, never ever let your partner hear you say complimenting other people for being hot or beautiful or attractive. Though it's a normal thing to admire other people, just be sure not to be too vocal about it when in front of your lover. This is usually the cause of fights between partners and one of the main reason of relationships breaking up. If you still can't help yourself, better start looking for someone else. Or just hope that the person you referred to as hot won't mind going out with you.

"My ex would..."
Don't ever start a statement with these words, unles you want to start a big fight. Comparing you current partner to your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is just a war waiting to happen. You lover have trusted that you have already moved on, so making any reference to your exes will just bring you back to awkward-ville, and surely you don't like that. Just remember that current relations and exes just won't mix.

"Your friend is a bitch/dick."
Never ever bad-mouht their friends, no matter how big of an asshole they really are. Those are people they trust and care about. Just assume that you too don't like your partner saying bad things about your friends, especially those who are really close to you. This is especially true with girls and their BFF.

"You bitch/dick."
If they don't like you telling bad things about their friends, they probably won't like it when you do it to them. Calling them "bitch" or "dick" or any cuss word for that matter is just not right. Not even when you are in the heat of the moment while your arte making love. Leave those kind of dirty talks to the pornstars, unless your girlfriend/boyfriend dig a little kinkiness in bed.

"I'm not good enough for you."
We've discussed ho most people admire confidence. So saying this line is just admitting to your partner that you are one big loser who should not even had the chance with them. Besides, no one likes quitters.

"If you really love me, you would..."
Saying saomething that start with these words is just a big no-no. First of all, you are giving them bad signals that you are not the one for them. Second of all, this statement just brags that you are questioning their love towards you. And finally, you are trying to make your partner do something that they really don't want to do, which in many ways tell them that you are a controlling bastard.

"You're just like your mother/father."
People love their parents, but that does not mean that they wanna be like them when they grow up. No matter what you might want to believe, no one would want to be compared to their mother or father because most children's aim in life is to be better than their parents. This statement is just saying that they failed miserably in life because you, of all the people, still thinks that they are just like their parents.

"I'm not in the mood"
Okay, this is not so much for the ladies because let's admit it, there's a double standard when it comes to bed. But for guys to say that they are not in the mood, it's just like a slap in the face of your ladylove because it is not that often that women make the first move when it comes to having sex. So turning them down on those rare situations is just a fight waiting to happen.

"I don't like that..."
No matter how hideous their stuff look to you, never ever tell your partner that you don't like it. You might get away with not complimenting their new shirt, pants or hair style, but trying to tell them that it's not good and you don't like it just gives them the signal to start shouting at you for being insensitive and being an ass.

So there you go, just some of the things you should avoid saying to your partner. And if there are instances that you are not sure what to say, just shut up and don't open your mouth to avoid hurt feelings. Silence is still golden, you know.

What to Talk About on That First Date...

Congratulations! You just got yourself a date with that hot chick you were eyeing at the bar. Or you're the the hot chick at the bar and you decided that it's alright to go out on a date with this hunky guy. Both of you decided that you'd rather have dinner together instead of taking too much time thinking what kind of date you should go to. Well, it's okay because the first date really is the time to get to know the person you're going out with to find out if they're worth your time. But of course, you can't just go ahead and order then eat your food as fast as you can so you could go home and watch TV. You have to talk with your date so the two of you can have a chance to know more about each other. Say weigh if you'll really click with each other. So here are just some ideas on what you guys can and cannot talk about on your first date.

Avoid talking about the past. Come on, it's your first date. You still have no right to dig up his/her life story. Especially when it comes to their past relationship. Keep th conversation off from issues about the ex's. It's either you'll just end up hurting your date because of bad memories or you getting pissed because they are still not over their former lovers.

"Got any brothers or sisters". This is one of the safe topics you can talk about. It's not very intrusive when asking your date if they have siblings. In fact, it just goes to show that you are very interested not only with them, but also their family. But remember, avoid asking about parents because this may also brought bad memories if they experienced a divorce or separation in the family.

Ask about the places where your date have been. Talking about past travel destinations, yours and your date's, will be fun. Not to say you'll get to know more about their personality because you'll know what kinds of things they like. This will also give you an idea to what kind of second date you can have, granting this first date goes well.

Talk about career plans. This one is actually tricky. For one, your date might go on and on about their achievement in school and on the job, making your night out more lively. But on the other hand, your date may just become upset because they are not really having good time with their work. Just be sure if the latter happen, you have a escape route or another topic in your head.

Ask about their friends. Many people say that you can judge a person with what kind of friends they have. This is a sure way of knowing your date's personality without being too intrusive and pushy. This way, your date may also think that you are nice for asking about people that are close to her.

"What do you do on your free time?" Another safe way to make sure that your date is opening up to you. If they are comfortable talking about things they do on their free time like going to the movies, shopping, roller blading, that means you're in. And this will also give you an idea for a fun activity you both can enjoy for future dates.

"What kind of music do you listen to?" Find out if you guys have the same taste in music. If you do, good for you. If not, tough luck. But at least you get to know what kind of person your date is because of the music they listen to. If more of the mellow type, then your date the sweet kind of person. But if they like heavy metal and goth, then prepare for more wild and crazy fun with them.

There you have it. These are just some ideas of things you guys can talk about when out on that first date. Just remember once again, that first dates are usually the time you'll get to know the other person a little better. So take advantage of this time and make the best out of it and make sure you are getting as much information about your date as you can. This is kind of the make-or-break part of it all, if you still wanna go for that second date or if you wanna bail. So good luck!