What NOT to do on the First Date

First impressions last - that's what most people say. Well, because it's true. That is why everyone who is on the dating game should know that the most important part the game is te first date and how you can use it to either make or break a relationship. Knowing what to do is one thing, but people should also know what NOT to do. And here are just some of them:

1. Trying too hard
It may be true that it's important to establish to the other person that you are a nice person, but it is also true that you should not overdo it. If you're a guy, being the knight in shining armor may be good, but it can also be too tacky. For the ladies, don't be too demure or sensitive. Just be your good self and let everything fall into their right place.

2. Choosing a bad venue
A couple of examples of bad dating venue are a fastfood joint, a Hooters bar and a very expensive resto. The first will tell your date you're cheap, the second that you're a pervert, and the last that you're an arrogant show-off. Just make it low profile, not too cheap and not too expensive. Or you can go on and be creative. A coffee house, the park, the beach - anywhere where the both of you can relax and have a good time talking and getting to know each other.

3. Being wishy-washy
If your date asks you where you wanna go, don't answer them with "doesn't matter." When it's time to order, don't be long and then just say that you're having what your date is having. This shows them that you are a spineless human being with no capability to decided for himself/herself. This is more awful if you're the guy. You don't want your date to think that you are the kind of guy who don't have plans and direction in life.

4. Watching too much TV
If by any chance you and your date end up in a place where there is a TV, say a restaurant or a bar with a tube behind the bar, you should never ever let them catch you watching it. Or better yet, don't even dare try to watch from it. And it doesn't matter if your favorite soap or gameshow is on. If your date is talking, you are suppose to listen and not wander on other things.

5. Being too honest
Honesty is the best policy, but not every time. And that includes the first date. This may not be the right time to tell your date that you have been arrested for drunk-driving or you have just gotten out of rehab. But that doesn't mean that you can lie. Just don't bring up your dark past when it's the first time you're going out with another person.

6. Constantly interrupting
The date is not only about you. Don't keep on jumping in when your date is trying to tell you a story about a trip they had or about their work. There is time for you to talk, and that is not when they are talking. That is just plain rude and is not only applicable on dates but in all kinds of social function. You should have known that by now.

7. Dressing inappropriately
Okay, you wanna impress your date. But please, don't do it with your body. If you happen to have a nice set of abs or breasts, don't flaunt too much of it and show them off with slutty clothes. Though this may work for some people, dressing up properly for the ocassion is still the prerequisite.

8. Going on taboo topics
You can talk about all sorts of things during your first date: yourself, background, work, past trips, etc. But just not the following: previous relationships, past heartbreaks, religion, politics and money. Also, avoid dropping names and bragging because these are topics more appropriate for locker room talks.

9. Flirting with the waiter/waitress
It doesn't matter if the person doing the waiting on your table is cute, hot and sexy. You are on a date and keep your focus on the person you're with. It's just rude to keep on checking out the waiter/waitress, or any other people around, when you are on a date.

10. Being drunk
It's okay to have fun on the first date. In fact, that is the main reason why you're there in the first place. Just don't have too much fun. It's okay to order a couple of alcoholic drinks, maybe a tequila shots for both of you. But it's important to know your limit because you don't wanna end up pissed drunk and you're date, the one person you are trying to impress, see you puking your guts out or passed out somewhere. That's just not cool.

So there you go. Just remember these simple scenearios and never ever let them happen on your first date. And we gurantee you will have an awesome dating life ahead of you.

You've Been Single Way Too Long Because...

Being single is great. You can do whatever you want, whenever, wherever and how you want it. You can come and go as you please. And you don't have to answer to anyone. But however great it may sound, being single is equal to being alone. And being alone your whole life is just not that cool. Being single is tantamount to being sad, lonely and, yes, celibate. So you better stand up from where you are sitting and go to the nearby bar and get yourself a drink. And maybe get yourself a pretty little girl or a hunky, handsome guy who will be willing to go out on a date with you and change your very lonesome life. You have just been single way too long because you...


...assume that you repulse women.
This is not good. Because confidence is one of the best weapon anyone can have in this dog-eat-dog world. And if you have become a single for too long, there is a tendency for you to lose your confidence that you can attract other people. Most people will take a smile or a prolonged glance as a good thing, but not for long-time singles. They have the tendency to take this as people making fun of them and judging them.

...develop bad eating habits.
Because you're always along with nothing to do, you tend to be hungry all the time and craving for food you really don't have to it. Imagine yourself being someone who have just been dumped by your partner, and put that in a time line that extend for years. Junk foods like ice cream and chips are your only friends.

...become too emotional.
Simple questions from friends and colleagues like "How are you doin'?" are answered with long, emotional dramatics of your single life. This is especially true for men who are known not to become too emotional. If you just keep on crying and being a baby about your sad life, better going out more.

...develop poor dating standards.
Okay, so you decide to get up off your butt and go out to find someone out there. But when you reached the bar, you find just about every single person there as attractive even though they are not. This is just a sign that you have been alone for too long because your judgment of other people is starting to plummet. Especially if you're the kind of person who used to be a choosy when it comes to people you go out on dates with.

...get a pet.
You have been single too long, you are always sad and alone. So you think that going to the pet store to get a dog or a cat will solve it. When this happen, back away for a second and think. Do you wanna be that old lady next door with bunch of cats and no other friends? Definitely no!

...surf the Internet to meet people.
Okay, so online dating is a legitimate way to find a date. With this entry, we are actually talking about those mail-order bride sites. If you're a guy and you start surfing these sites "just out of curiosty," there is something wrong with you and you better start assessing the situation before you do something drastic and stupid.

...look at friends as possible lovers.
This is just sad. There's a reason why they are your friends. So you better not scare them off because that boat have already sailed. Just don't be insistent enough to believe that your pals are going to be more than just that. Hey, you may just end up losing friends when you become stubborn.

...play too many video games.
There's a reason why geeks and nerds don't get the ladies. That is because they are too busy with all their science stuff and video games. And if you start engaging in activities like them, well you are becoming one of them because you've been alone for way too long.

...ask your mom for dating advice.
This is probably the last resort for you, especially if you're a guy. You've been single for so long that you are willing to take that awkward step to ask your mother about relationship. Though they may know what's best for you in most situation, parents should just be left at the dark when it comes to people you are trying to get to bed.

...Google for old your exes.
They've already left you. Or you left them. And there is a reason for this. So if you start looking for them once again, or worst, check up on them, it just means that you have become too desperate because you've been alone too long.


What the hell are you waiting for? If you have at least one of these things, then you better get up from that couch. Stop being sad and lonely and start going out more. You definitely need a drastic change with your social life and you better start going on dates before you become a sad middle-aged loner.

Signs That You Are Getting Lucky

One of the most complicated factors when it come to the dating game is whether the other person is interested, especially the more serious part of the relationship, the sexual. It is very easy to misinterpret a mere act of kindness as sexual interest so everybody should be careful not to quick to assume, or else you're goal will just slip away that easily too. So deciphering their gestures, language and movement is very well important in this stage to know when you really are going to get lucky. So we here at Dating 4-1-1 decided to just help you guys out to avoid any more confusions so you'll know when to make THAT move. So here are some signs that may indicate that you are going to get some.

Drinks for everyone
If the person offers to buy you a drink or already bought one for you, it is a clear indication that they are pretty interested in you. This also shows, if the person is a woman, that she is a confident and strong type of lady who knows what she wants. So if she's giving you this invitation, take it before she change her mind.


Touchy feelings
Body language is a key in knowing if a person is interested in you, especially to know if they are willing to go to the physical. So if your date keeps on touching you affectionately on the arms or the legs in the midst of a conversation, chances are they are also trying to tell you that they want you to do the same with them later on. This is also true if they let you touch them and feel you up.

Compliments, compliments, compliments...
Women are not the only ones who like being praised and commended. Men too like getting their egos fed, especially by women. That is why is your date keeps on complimenting your looks, the way you dress and the smell of your cologne, they are definitely looking for something more later on in the night that will let you show them that you like what they were saying about you.

Eye contacts
If your date maintains prolonged eye contacts, those lasting more than 5 seconds with you during your conversation, this just shows that they have extra interest in you and is not afraid to explore on these feelings later on.

Lean in, lean out
Most people maintain their personal space when they are talking to people they don't really like. But the opposite is true for people who is showing interest to another person. So if your date keeps on leaning towards you when you guys are talking, this just means that they definitely wanna get closer.

Sharing privates
Okay, not that private yet. But you're definitely getting closer if your date is already comfortable in sharing private information to you. So if you find yourself engaging in more a personal talk with your date, it is probably time to make your move to be a bit more personal with them too.

Talking dirty
There is no clearer sign that you are getting lucky if your date starts talking about sexual stuff with you. This just means that you are over that vanilla-boundary and ready to explore each other a little bit better. So don't let the moment pass you and reciprocate. If you did it right, you'll probably end up in the right side of the bed.

Okay, so there is really no scientific formula to help daters predict how their night out will end up. But if you only take time to be aware of the small details such as these stated above, you can at least be sure that your rating when it comes to "scoring" will go up a notch higher.

Things That Guys Should Never Ask Their Girlfriends

Last week, the good people of Dating 4-1-1 have listed some of the things you should never ever say to your partner to avoid any complications that could probably ruin your relationship. We certainly hope that those things did help you out and will help you out more in the time. Of course, we know that you guys still want more. So as a follow-up to that article, here is another article that will help you avoid any other unnecessary fight that may come your way. Here are some things you guys out there should never ask your girlfriends (Next post, something for the ladies.)

"Can I borrow some money?"
It may sound too cliche but it it still the common belief that the man is supposed to provide for the woman in their relationship. This is to make her feel more secure and sure about your relationship. So asking her to lend you money shatters this faith completely, especially to those women who are more dependent to their partners. This will also make her question you money sense, putting doubt in her mind about you being the strong and capable alpha-male who is supposed to have the financial responsibility in the relationship. If you are having money problems, why not just ask a buddy or get another job.

"Are you wearing that?"
There's a reason why women take so much time getting prepared when you guys are going out for a date. And that is because they are always making sure that they look good for you. This also assures them about themselves. But when you ask them this question, it's just the same as telling them that they are ugly or they don't look good at all. This question is also telling her that all her hard work in preparing for you just went down the drain. Just appreciate the fact that they took time to dress up because let's admit it, dressing up for women is a lot more difficult than for men.

"Why don't you go to the gym?"
This is a like the previous one. Asking him this question is just like telling her that she is a fat pig. And you know that no woman likes being told that she is fat. So if you ever feel that your girlfriend is gaining more weight than necessary, try telling her in a more subtle way.

"How many guys have you slept with?"
Most guys are pretty much fantasizing that their girlfriends are virginal being untouched by any form of vulgarity. But most of the time, this is not the case. And if you are a sane fellow, you will never ever think that you are your girlfriend's first-time. The same as you should never ever try to ask her how many fellows has she been with. Just be happy that you are together at the present and not go back to silly past relationships.
"Do you wanna have a threesome?"
Unless you have a girlfriend who is a nymphomaniac or a pornstar, this question should always be kept to yourself. Asking you partner to partake in your deepest sexual fantasy, no matter how dreamy and romantic you wanna put it, is always very dangerous. For one because of that green-eyed monster called jealousy. Then add to that your girlfriend wondering for the rest of your time together that she may not be enough for you that's why you're trying to add someone to your sexual relationship.

"Did you cum?"
It's a common notion that when men finish up during sex, most women may not have really started with theirs. That is why there have been so many popular consensus about women faking it to avoid hurting the ego and feelings of their partner. However, this doesn't give any man rights to ask if their partner did finish up like he did. The question just puts her in the spot and brings into question her sincerity to you. And besides, asking this question just after you guys have shared a special bond is definitely a mood killer. Just be happy that she is doing it with you and not some horny bastard out there.

"Why do you have to be such a bitch?"
This is just like saying that she is a bitch. Enough said.

So there you go. Just some of the questions no man should ask his girlfriend unless he wants to end a pretty good relationship. Next post, the list for all the ladies out there.

The Dating Ten Commandments

Though many say that there are really no clear and standard rules when it comes to dating (we here at Dating 4-1-1 believe so too), there are still somethings we can do to make sure that we have a very healthy and successful dating life. That is why we on this humble site decided to come up with the Dating Ten Commandments. And we came up with these:


1. Thou shall not talk about the exes too much.

Everybody has their own baggage that comes from several past relationships. And these baggages have no place when it comes to trying to impress another person. So just avoid talking too much about past boyfriends or girlfriends to the one your currently dating. Though you may talk about it once in a while, but that is only when you guys have already been together long.

2. Thou shall not frequent your exes.

If you're not allowed to talk about them that much, you are not also allowed to spend too much time with them. As much as you like to stay friends with your exes, this does not look good to the person you are currently dating. Unless you wanna risk being dumped and being along again.

3. Thou shall learn how to compliment.
Learn how to make the other person feel good about themselves. A little pat on the back when they did something nice, especially for you, is not half-bad. Good ol' fashion compliments are never out of style like telling your date they look good.

4. Thou shall not put your partner to the pedestal.

Though most people like the feeling that other people treat them importantly, overdoing it may also kill it. There's nothing wrong with praising and commending things that your partners have done, but never do this in such a way that you are treating them just like they are gods and goddesses. Just try to treat them like normal people. Remember: no one is perfect.

5. Thou shall not be too enthusiastic.

When we say "too enthusiastic," this include people who acts like stalkers. It's alright to be concerned on what your partner is doing at certain moments, but not every time. There's still a thin line between being caring and being too clingy. YOu don't wanna seem too pathetic also.

6. Thou shall not be too serious.

This means that when you think someone is not into you, just give up. They say that quitting is not good, but it is when it comes to dating. Especially when you see that all your efforts are just going down the drain. It'll be easy for both parties to just move on with the next thing and forget all about it.

7. Thou shall not discuss other men/women.

Jealousy the most common perpetrator of broken relationship. So just don't let this green-eyed monster get in between you and the person you are dating. Avoid talking about other people and saying good things about them.

8. Thou shall not let yourself go.

After you've been able to spend some time with someone, that does not mean that you can let your guard down. Well, you can be comfortable around them at a certain point, but not too much. Just don't forget to do stuff that can impress the other person because admit it, dating is always all about survival of the fittest. And once you let your guard down, you are dead meat.

9. Thou shall not rush into things.

Leave the "wanna go out this weekend?" and "wanna meet my parents?" lines at home especially when you are still on the start of a relationship. You are just bringing awkwardness to much greater levels and that will leave you all alone once again.

10. Thou shall not lose faith.

Faith on whom? Well, yourself. Because no matter what happens, you will always have yourself to fall back into. And besides, if you don't believe that you can find that one special person, you will not. So just continue on dating and never quit until you meet the right one for you.